So I won’t keep you waiting for the infamous truck pictures. They are crappy camera phone shots, because I was too lazy to go back inside for my real camera. I FINALLY got my car back tonight after mucho bullshit. Ducky helped me out by pooping on the floor of the car dealership, though. It’s five days until I have to go back to work. HOORAY!
Categories: Life · OMG HAHA!!
I’m having some work done on my “Mom” car (which is going to cost almost $500!!!! GRRR!) and it won’t be ready until tommorrow afternoon at the earliest. So they sent me to Enterprise, and this is what they gave me. (This is a stock photo, I will take pics of the actual truck before I return it) At first I was all, OMG, I can’t have a pickup truck, but now I think it’s hilarious. I mean come on, a Chevy Cobalt or a Nissan Pathfinder aren’t funny. The only thing that would have been funnier would have been a Cargo Van. Or a bucket truck. Or maybe a cement mixer.
I’ll tell you what though. This fucker can move. I was going 75 on the highway and I didn’t even know. And, it’s huge and intimidating. It is 3 or 4 feet higher than J/Daddy’s The Highlander’s Jeep Cherokee. Ducky said “Cool Car” when I picked her up from day care. I think I’ll name it George.
Categories: Life · OMG HAHA!!
So, this is a quickie post to keep the last one from being on top. I’m tired of looking at it.
Nothing much to report here. My job is going well, J/Daddy The Highlander’s job is still frustrating as hell, and Ducky likes “school”. She asked to go to school when she woke up today. I don’t blame her at all, yesterday, she had pizza AND a petting zoo. Who wouldn’t love that?
She doesn’t exactly cry when I leave, but she definately gets a very nervous look on her face. And a get a HUGE hug and kiss when I come get her. If it takes me more than 5.2 seconds to collect her things and speak to her teacher, then she starts pulling on my leg saying “No Mama, BYE BYE”
That’s all folks. Show’s over, nothing more to see here!
Have a good weekend!
Categories: Ducky-Duck · Good Times · Life
Recently a friend of mine mentioned that she doesn’t speak to her father anymore. She went on to say that she hates when people try to give her unsolicited advice about the situation. And she’s not the only one. Every one of us, if not through personal experience can think of at least a dozen people who have “Deadbeat [fill in the relative] stories. Since I, too have estranged relatives, hearing this from so many different people should comfort me, make me feel that I am not alone. It doesn’t. It makes me even sadder.
I have not had a relationship with my brother and sister (from my father’s first marriage) for 16 years. We have spoken, sporadically in that time, but except for a few stray Christmas and Birthday cards, we know NOTHING about each other’s day to day lives. I don’t want to get into what caused the fight, but the rift between us is HUGE. I saw them last at our Father’s funeral, but I had so much anger towards them (in particular, my sister) that I was pretty horrible to them. I called neither of them to tell them I was engaged, or that I was pregnant. I didn’t invite them to my wedding. My sister invited me to hers, but I figured it was an “obligation” invite. Besides, it would have hurt to be in audience and not the wedding party. I know, it’s stupid, but that’s my SISTER. We were close until I was 13. She was my best friend and I looked up to her. I imagine that’s why I didn’t want her at my wedding either. Her sitting in the back row (if she’d even have come) would have been too depressing, like a reminder of all the people I’ve had to leave behind in my life. And being that my dad had just died 8 months before, and I was 5 months pregnant, I’m surprised I held it together as well as I did.
When Ducky was around three months old, I realized that I’d have to tell her about her aunt and uncle. I couldn’t figure out what in the world I would tell her when that time came. So I decided to write (real letters! the HORROR!) to them. I gave them the abridged version of what was going on in my life, and told them that while I was still angry, that I wanted to TRY to put it behind us. I gave them all my contact info and enclosed pictures from our wedding and Ducky’s hospital mug shot. My brother emailed about 2 months later. I was shaking when I saw it in my inbox, and had tears streaming down my face as I was reading it. We emailed back and forth a few times, and now we are at a really strange place. We don’t talk, but I had a breakdown in the card aisle of Wal-Mart picking out his birthday card.
My sister mailed me a christmas tree from LL Bean that year. This year she sent me a wreath.
I guess this is as much of a relationship as all of us can handle right now. I think the two of them want more (eg- my sister wrote me a thank you note for her birthday card), but they are once again leaving it up to me. I prefer to think they are scared of their BIG, BAD, BABY SISTER! FEAR THE BABY SISTER (i know, enough already with the CAPS!!!)
My point, and I do have one is I need them Even after all this time. Even after the events that I can’t get into here that created this distance. But why? Biology alone doesn’t make a family. It’s the caring, nurturing, understanding, support, laughter, tears, and fights and a lot more I’m not even thinking of. Why can’t I leave this behind me? All we have in common is DNA. Why is that so important to me? Why did I make my husband and friends EARN a place in my heart if I’m going to sit here and pine for people who for the last 16 years wouldn’t piss on me if I was on fire?
Categories: Life
Tommorrow, I re-enter the (paid) workforce. And it’s a good thing, too. My SSN was getting flabby and lethargic due to disuse. I’m excited about working, and the money won’t hurt either, but mostly it’ll be nice to excercise my brain in different ways, too. Ducky-Duck just spent her second full day in daycare, and she seems to really love it. She won’t stop what she’s doing to say goodbye to me in the morning, and doesn’t run to me at night. But she doesn’t protest when I tell her it’s time to go home. I know it’s only been 2 days, but what a load off! I was terrified of how she’d react.
I have felt so spoiled these past 2 days. I got to do exectly what I wanted when I wanted, except of course sleep late! It was bizarre to drive past her deycare center while I was out doing errands, and know that my kid was in there. The vaction’s over!
So that is all my friends. Not feeling particularly witty or articulate tonight.
Categories: Ducky-Duck · Life
I don’t know if I mentioned this, but I also have a MySpace blog. No big whoop, I had to start somewhere, BUT, I’m kind of notorious for posting Memes. I am a meme-aholic. If only because I’m too lazy to tell you about myself by actually WRITING something. So here’s one I wouldn’t be embarrassed to have my grandmother read. 
1. What color is most reflective of you?
Purple
2. How did you get the idea for your profile name?
Oh, don’t make me explain it again
3. What time were you born?
In the dawning of the age of Aquarius, or 3:47 pm
4. Has the death of a celebrity ever made you cry?
Shamefully, yes. Princess Diana.
5. What color underwear are you wearing?
Wearing Underwear is so ‘97.
6. Do you want a baby?
I have one, but I’m DYING for another.
7. What does your dad do for a living?
My dad passed away three years ago. But he was a salesman, and before that a cop.
8. Do you find it irritating when people who create surveys can’t count above 10?
No, because I’d be done in 2 questions.
9. What is/are your pet’s name(s)?
Tia, our majestic cat. And assorted fish. We used to name them but they kept dying. The survivors from the naming era are Bender, Flexo, Zoidberg, Bugsy, Scuzzlebutt and the Pom-Pom squad.
10. ???? again?
Only if it involved tequila
11. What are the last 3 digits of your phone number?
323
12. What was the last concert you attended?
NO FUCKING WAY! Too Embarrassing. I was 13, that should give you a clue to just how bad it is
13. Who was with you?
My mom, my sister and my best friend. My sis and BF and I all wore matching t-shirts and B-I-G hair
14. What was the last movie you watched?
Da Vinci Code
15. Who do you dislike most at this moment?
NOPE. Not touching that one.
16. What food do you crave right now?
Salad. Seriously.
17. Did you dream last night?
Yes. But I can’t tell you about it here. 
18. What was the last TV show you watched?
Family Guy rerun on Adult Swim
19. What is your fav piece of jewelry?
Diamond stud earrings
20. What is to the left of you?
J/Daddy’s desk (and the man himself)
21. What was the last thing you ate?
Chicken Caesar salad.
22. Who is your best friend of the opposite sex?
Duh. It’s Nacho Libre. (of course it’s the hubster)
23. Write a song lyric that’s in your head?
I’m goin’ off the rails on this Crazy Train!!
24. Who last IMd you?
Wow. NO IDEA. If I had to guess, probably my cousin. Either I IM all the time or not at all
25. Where is your significant other right now?
At his computer
26. Do you have a crush?
YES! YES! YES!
27. What is his/her name?
GEORGE CLOONEY!
29. When was the last time you cut your hair?
Months ago. I’m lazy about that.
30. Are you on any meds?
Negative
31. Do you have a mental disease?
Only consciousness
32. What shirt are you wearing?
Black v-neck t shirt
33. What color is your razor?
No idea. Reoranyelgreblupurpbrowblack?
34.????
@#$%& ?
35. What is your fav frozen treat?
Haagen Dazs Chocolate, or Bomb Pops
36. How many tattoos do you have?
None.
37. What’s your favorite store?
Target, I guess, though I do have a deep and abiding love for Costco.
38. Are you thirsty?
Yes, parched! I think I’ll pour a bunch of Grey Goose down my throat!
39. Can you imagine yourself ever getting married?
No need to imagine.
40. Who’s someone you haven’t seen in a while and miss?
My cousins, Crispy and Cakesniffer (yes the psuedonyms apply to EVERYONE. Except me. I’m special)
Categories: Wasting Time · Where memes go to die
Before I launch into my tirade, let me tell you about a small personality quirk I have that drives everyone who knows me apeshit bonkers. I loathe talking about the weather. I find it an insufferably boring and tedious topic. There is absolutely NADA that I or any of us can do about the weather. And we all are required as humans to make polite small talk from time to time. And usually the safest bet is the damn weather. So I really hate discussing it with those closest to me. I can think of 50 other things just off the top of my head that I’d rather talk about with my husband, or my mom, for instance. All of my family and friends know this about me, yet I still get questions like, “It’s raining. Was it supposed to rain”? But this post isn’t about my family, it’s about me. I’m hanging my head in anticipation of the shame of typing the sentence I am about to type.
What’s up with the goddamned rain? I waited until Ducky woke up from her nap to go grocery shopping, which was a stupid idea, i know, but just as I was getting her shoes on I looked out the sliding glass door and saw iron grey clouds. It is now a minor deluge, and I’m hoping it lets up a bit so I can still go. Definately NOT looking forward to trying to carry a toddler and $200 worth of groceries up the walk from wherever I manage to find parking in this godforsaken no assigned space apartment complex while tacking into a gale. I’m not a shrinking violet, if it’s raining, I do what I have to do, but it was been full on monsoon season here this last month or so. I’m still a SAHM for another week, but I can’t put everything off until tommorrow!
SON OF A MOTHERLESS GOAT! I need to get to the grocery store to buy cold cuts! And Juice boxes! And Blue’s Clues Yogurt! Damnit!!!
It feels good to be a hypocrite.
Categories: Life
I never considered myself a cat person. I didn’t like the aloof cats. I was like, fine, I don’t like you , either. And I didn’t like the cats who were all over me either, begging for attention. What are you a cat trapped in a dog’s body? That was, of course until I met Tia. My beautiful, dignified, aloof, affectionate, active, vital, loyal and loveable cat. It took some time for her to warm up to me. She had been J/Daddy’s cat for a very long time, and she was very protective of him. But the first time I met her, she didn’t try to sit between us on the couch. I was assured this was an excellent sign. Later that night, she let me come to her and pet her. She wasn’t what I’d call standoffish, but possessed with a supreme dignity. She wasn’t about to beg for it, but oh man did she want me to pet her ears.
When I met her back in 2003, she had this little wound on her chest. J/Daddy said that the vet (who turned out to be a money grubbing ASSHOLE) told him that it was just a “hot spot” and as long as she kept it clean it should be fine. This had been going on for years. In the spring of 2004, right before I had Ducky-Duck, we took Tia to Dr. Sphincter for her annual exam, and we started treating the wound. He shaved her chest and gave us steriod cream to put on it 3x a day. Well the steriods made her diabetic (or so he said) and he wanted to put her on insulin twice a day. I asked if it could be controlled with diet and pills, like with some humans. He agreed, but threw a bitch fit, and made us come EVERY WEEK (at $50 a shot) for blood sugar testing. J/Daddy and I put our collective foot down, until it was monthly, then quarterly. And the wound kept getting worse the more he fooled around with it.
It all came to a head in February of this year. The wound was starting to smell infected. And we were in the process of finding another vet. Then a WHOLE CHUNK of her skin fell off. J/Daddy took her to the Veterinary ER, and then we went to a new vet. She was fabulous, the anti-Dr.Sphincter, she was Dr. Wonderful. She referred us to a specialist, Dr. Super-Surgeon, who operated and told us that our precious girl had cancer. And guess what, Dr. Sphincter, she WAS NOT diabetic. Dr. Super-Surgeon said she’s gotten all of the cancer that was possible to get surgically. She recommended radiation. We decided not to put poor Tia through that. Dr. Super-Surgeon was relived considering that Tia is 16 and she wasn’t sure how she’d take weekly general anesthesia.
So this brings us to now. Tia has been having a hard time walking and more recently breathing. So we took her to Dr. Wonderful on Tuesday, and she said that the cancer had likely invaded her shoulder joint and her lungs. She wanted us to put her to sleep right then and there, but we’re not quite ready to say goodbye yet. So Dr. Wonderful gave us some steriods to give her in the hopes that it will help her breathing for the short term. We don’t have much longer with our beautiful girl. I’m going to miss her terribly. We all will.
I never knew just how much I could love her.
Categories: Tia
Just a quickie post:
J/Daddy, my mom, and I took Ducky to a local kiddie amusement park for her birthday. And we “drove” our truck from the backseat! She had lots of fun on the merry-go-round, the trucks, the super submarine, and the train. She also enjoyed bites of chicken nuggets, french fries, nachos, hot dogs, and sips of fruit punch. And the cherry on top of the evening was that I won an “XL” Bob the Builder for her. Go Mommy!
We got home, put the kiddo to bed, and my mom and I went to go see The Da Vinci Code I was so disappointed. I loved the book, and it just didn’t work that well on screen, I thought. Oh well.
Categories: Ducky-Duck · Life
I am living in a cesspool! We have been working on potty training the Duck for a few months now, and the mess is everywhere! It all started around Easter or thereabouts when she just.wouldn’t.leave.the.damn.diaper.on. She’s pretty good at asking for the potty, but usually, it’s after the fact. We’ve had some small victories this week, where she actually made it to the blasted potty chair.
As if that wasn’t punishment enough, I decided that today was the day to throw out the diapers, sort of a sink or swim approach, as much for me as for her. We are armed only with a half dozen pairs each of Dora and Elmo underpants.
What did I get myself into? This is getting brutal. And did I mention that I don’t have a washer and dryer?
Categories: Ducky-Duck
