Get off my lawn, you damn kids!

So we’re back. We stayed an hour. It was cold, I was bored, but Ducky enjoyed herself. She shot hoops, played on the SLIDE!!!, jumped in the moon bounce (and took her socks off in 40 degree weather!!) painted a pumpkin, and threw a tantrum decided NOT to wait in line to get her face painted.

She was ecstatic when I told her she was going to “school” today. We had to walk around the side, and she freaked out, screaming “THIS WAY!”, or in Duck-speak, “SWAY, SWAY!” when we passed the front doors.

I left early. I couldn’t take it anymore. The parents at this school are sooooo snobby.
I guess I am officially a miserable person that I was bored at a children’s activity. Won’t be long before I’m shooing kids off my lawn at our new house.

Festy

We’re going to a “Fall Festival” at Ducky’s day care later today. Somehow, they will manage to cram pumpkin painting, moon bounce jumping, lunch (that I have to pack. on a saturday!!!)eating, AND MORE!!! Into 2 fun filled hours.

Actually, I’m looking forward to it. I love a free activity, and I’m sure she’ll love it.

All dressed up with nowhere to go

Ducky Duck, The Highlander and I went to an anniversary party last Saturday. It was a really cool party with a casino theme. Ducky loved the dancefloor and the slot machine.

Here she is, mid cutting a rug

Sorry about the watermark. I’m being super-selective about what I post, even with the watermark. I had a bad experience with an internet psycho, so I’m trying to be more cautious. I don’t want to talk about the details of what went down with this crazie, because I don’t want to encourage this sort of behavior.

I wish it didn’t have to be this way. Dooce gets 50000 hits a day and publishes her full name and pictures of her daughter all the time. I’m just not brave enough to do it. I don’t need someone turning up on my doorstep.

Triskaidekaphobia

Triskaidekaphobia.Otherwise known as the fear of Friday the 13th. I was irrationally sure that something bad was going to happen today. Just an ordinary day.

Friday the 13th always makes me think of my dad. He was very superstitous. If the Yankees lost, and I was out, it was because I wasn’t home to watch the game with him. He was so leery of Friday the 13th, that he would usually call in sick that day. My father didn’t call in sick when he was sick!

Thinking of him made me smile today.

Just One missed pill away from “PUSH”

So I got my IUD removed today. WHOOO HOOO!

Don’t get too excited. We’re NOT trying, just having fun practicing!

Having an IUD was a miserable experience for me, and I’m thrilled that it’s out. I was really looking forward to my appointment today, but not to the actual removal. I’ve had one pulled before and it hurt like a mofo. This was barely even uncomfortable.

OK. I think you all know way more than you wanted about my uterus.

The one and only (and I do mean only) advantage to the IUD was I was free from the constant pregnancy worries. I swear I must have spent $400 on Clearblue Digital Pregnancy tests the year after I had Ducky.

So the heat is on, once again. No longer do I have to be neurotically afraid the the IUD is going to punture my colon. This is instead replaced with my old friend, “my boobs are sore, I’m gonna buy a test”.

Anyone know where I can buy pregnancy tests in bulk?

OMG!! WTF? HAHAHA

Well, after I wrote the last post, I bleached my entire apartment. Actually, just the kitchen. A-N-Y-W-A-Y, I checked out blogthings, and took this little gem of a quiz. Below are my results:

You Have A Type A+ Personality

You’re driven to succeed every single second of the dayAnd you don’t let up on your goals, no matter how tired you are You’ve already acheived a lot in your life… but it’s not enough for you Always on the go, you tend to get things done quickly and effectively You have the personality to be a successful enterpreneur Just remember to play a little too, even if play is the most difficult thing for you!

Do You Have a Type A Personality?

Playing Catch Up

In my younger, pre-wife and mommy years, I tried really hard to appear that I had it all together. I accomplished this mostly through actually keeping it together, along with just a pinch of deluding myself.

I still like to delude myself, but I can’t fucking keep it together. Other people, men women, people without children, people with litters of children, young, old, money, no money somehow accomplish a manageable life. But me. Hell no.

I never get around to grocery shopping beyond the BARE necessities for Ducky. Forget cooking. My house is messy, and recently dirty (EWWW) all the time, and let’s not even talk about the laundry. I pay people to do my laundry, yet I still don’t take until there is 300 lbs worth. And then I don’t put it away.

And this is not just because I work full time now. Things have not changed substantially since I was a SAHM. Even before Duck was born, I just could.not.get.my pregnant ass off the couch to unpack. I never thought of myself as a lazy person, but I’ve come to the realization that I am. And that hurts. But I’m too lazy to change. (A JOKE. I DON’T NEED THE NUMBER OF A SUICIDE HOTLINE. OR A PROZAC PRESCRIPTION)

There is a reason I call myself Type a. I have all the expectations of the overacheiver Type A personality, and NONE of the drive anymore. I’m always behind, always doing things piecemeal and at the last minute. I say “Fuck it, it’s good enough”, all the time. I swear to betsy*, no one else lives like this. People handle their business and just shut the fuck up about it already.

Why can’t I just do it? (DO EEEETTTT)

*a joke from The Highlander’s and my honeymoon. I’ll tell you about it soon.